Sex & Sandwiches: 8 Tips To Keeping Your Man Happy
These days, it’s getting harder & harder for people to hold onto relationships. With the constant onslaught of ridiculous reality shows that teach women to be even more ratchet than before and the steady decline of two parent homes, people are becoming more & more focused on their own needs rather than the needs of their partner...and relationships are failing. As a woman, I know that a lot of this has to do with the change in mentality women have had in recent years. It’s gone from women being the glue that holds everything together, to the chick trying so hard to think like a man, that she loses the guy she already has. This is becoming sadder and sadder, so I’m offering up 8 tips for women to keep their man happy, and thus, strengthen the relationship!
1. Trust: If it’s one thing men hate, it’s being accused of something they haven’t done & having to defend themselves against wild assumptions. He wants to be able to hang out with his boys without having to worry about you driving past with your car lights off every 30 minutes, or blowing up his phone with pointless conversation. Relax, take a deep breath, find a damn hobby, and TRUST YOUR MAN. If you can’t do that, then you shouldn’t be with him!
2. Space: This is self-explanatory. No man in his right mind wants you sitting up under his left nut constantly. Men need breathing room. They need to not see your face when the game is on, or when they just want to chill and play video games for hours at a time. Let him breathe. Go to work. Go out with your friends. Go shopping. Doesn’t really matter, just make sure that your man gets his much needed MAN TIME. Trust me, you won’t regret it.
3. Sex:It’s sad that I even have to add this as a tip, but some women really don’t know, so here we go. Firstly, stop threatening to take sex away from him if he doesn’t do something. He’ll leave you. Secondly, stop being routine. No man only wants to do it in missionary position, on scheduled days of the month. Spice it up. Meet him at the door naked. Add in sexy outfits or props. Call in a couple friends. Whatever the case, great sex makes for a very happy man!
4. Sandwiches: Simply put… men want chicks who will make them sandwiches nshit. It’s that easy. Feed your man and he will be happy. Don’t feed him & you’ll constantly find him next door with the big booty chick that makes steaks every day.
5. Reciprocation: This may come as a shock to some of you ladies, but you know all of those things you want your man to do to you, like buy you dinner, or shoes, or randomly take you out somewhere nice… MEN WANT THAT TOO!!! Stop being a self-centered lady dog and start treating him like a King, instead of expecting the queen treatment and giving nothing in return. That’s the quickest way to get cheated on.
6. Attention: Pay attention to what your man has to say. I know you truly may not care about that Laker game last night or about the newest Jordans being released, but guess what? All those times he pretended to care about who your best friend’s cousin is dating and why you can’t wear a certain pair of shoes after a certain time of the year means that you owe him one. Or two. Or five.
7. Understanding: Understand that he is a man & will never, ever think like you or any of the friends you always seek advice from. It’s time to grow up and realize, men will never be able to read your minds, they’ll never remember little cutsie dates as well as you, and they will NEVER care about who did what on Basketball Wives. Stop trying to turn him into your girlfriend, and respect him for the man that he is.
8. Privacy: This is one of the biggest ones. STOP TELLING YOUR FRIENDS ALL YOUR BUSINESS AND THEN ALLOWING THEM TO INFLUENCE THE DECISIONS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS. I’ve always said, if you’re going to let your friends tell you how to treat your man, then you should let them sleep with him too. If that’s a little too close and personal for you, then keep your mouth shut and handle your problems in house! Stop venting on Twitter and Facebook, stop asking your single and angry friends for advice, and stop looking everywhere else, but at your man to solve your relationship problems.
I sincerely hope that you learned something from this, and that you ladies out there will realize that a relationship DOESN’T REVOLVE AROUND YOU!! You can thank me later.